Day One: Meetings & Mask Mishaps

Oh boy. Did we ever needed that weekend.

Two full days with my chosen family of freaks - Hikarinaka, Alisa Tutchena, Starrywolf, and our newest addition, Saddy - and honestly? My spirit needed a refill of pure oxygen and a solid twelve-hour nap. 🧪

There were costumes. Confessions. Confusion. And enough caffeine-fueled energy to power half the city grid.

Mostly though… there was joy. Pure, unadulterated, chaotic joy.

Let me introduce you to our latest recruit…

…Saddy.

Alisa pulled them over from Moscow, saying they would be glad to come over if we can chip in an outfit for them. And so we did! Hika brought a guest mask, Alisa provided hada and paddings, we all brought some clothes for them…

Just look at them! All dolled up and ready to be played with!😈 Exactly what we did a bit later.😉

As for me, I’ve had some great new of my own.

First of all, I introduced my new kigu mask of Shimakaze from Kantai Collection!

I’ll write more about the making process in a separate post later, but the main point here is… I love it! It went out much better than I expected it to be, is adequately comfortable and all the spotted negatives are minor and can be rectified later.

Damn I love how this uniform looks with this mask! Much better than with Makima. A great mix of cute and sexy, cool and silly.😄

I also pulled out my PVC paws from that Miku set. I think they fit quite nicely with this uniform. Did you know that they can used as a bondage? If you lock up all the zippers, it’ll be really hard to take these off. Yeah, I used this excuse to not help with moving stuff and taking photos. Hehe~

Everyone got into PVC, (aside from Wolfie, they brought latex), and we took some to to appreciate each other. It felt amazing. The smell of plastic in the room, the sound of crinkling rubber, the sight of shiny bodies everywhere… Perfection.💎

Later I changed into something more comfy, allowing Hika to try out Miku set. The catsuit itself is just a tad bit short for me and them to comfortably wear, but they decided to persevere.💪

This sweater is also a treasure I found recently. So cozy and soft! Alisa changed up too so we could both rest up and relax.😌 Hika became our sealed up toy, which we all played with for some time.

It’s so fucking hot to touch them while the stiff plastic bag hugs their body and face like this!😚💘

Starrywolf, bless their heart, was busy filming us non-stop. It was hilarious watching ourselves lose track of time completely.

Later, Hika tried walking around the apartment. This looked really silly, but we’ve managed to get them into the shower. (Dunno why we did this. They were sealed and nothing happened of course.)

The first day was rather short since we took time to arrive, chat and get ready, so that’s basically where it ended.

Day Two: Power Plays & Pretty Dresses

Day two began early for me. While others went out to do their private business, I came in, kicked off my shoes and immediately snatched Hikarinaka away.

“Photographer duties,” I declared, pointing my finger directly at them.

They didn’t protest much.😊

First up, I wanted to try out my Femme Fatale vibe for an upcoming photoshoot I’m planning. Yes, I’m serious about this one.

I slid into my new creation - a long, red silky gown with a deep V-cut that leaves absolutely nothing to the imagination and finishes with deep cutout at my hips. Over this masterpiece, I threw on a thick, plush white faux-fur coat. Picture it: classic, dangerous seduction. A ghost of the Roaring Twenties given a modern twist. 🥂

We spent about half an hour just messing around, finding poses and getting the lighting right. Hika, bless them, knows their angles. They captured my essence perfectly – a perfect balance between cool dominance and raw sexuality.

Next up, another experiment. My decade-old KC Shimakaze cosplay. A relic, dusted off and dragged into the light once again.

Did it still fit? - Yes. Was it comfortable? - Surprisingly, yes, but a bit stiff on my chest.

Where’s the goddamned tie?! - Who cares!? The uniform looks incredible! Cute, sexy, perfect for being silly.✨ Expect me doing a lot of stuff with this outfit later!🫡

Try cramming a 3300 ton ship inside this tiny lavatory! 🤣

Afterwards, everyone arrived back to the apartment, and so we gave PVC another go-round. Makima wearing a tight PVC dress, walking around with her chest spilling out, grabbing everyone around by their necks, disciplining unruly pets with a cane… Classic at this point. 🖤👠

Starrywolf was wearing a respirator under his mask, with breathing tubes sticking out for better ventilation. Or some breathplay. 💋

The way their body jerked when they tried to inhale the air that simply wasn’t there. The way moaned for my mercy. Beautiful… 🫦

Then, one more change-up of the night.

Cozy time with Alisa. Matching outfits. Nothing major, just quiet conversation and resting. Sometimes, this is the most intimate activity possible. Being close to someone without having to perform.

And finally… The last activity.

Alisa had a bondage sleeping back for quite some time already, but it always eluded me. Either she forgets it, or we don’t have time, or I’m not in the mood…

But this time, I was.

Saddy had brought a Furrjoi puppy hood, which I know is pretty comfy, but also blocks all sight. I’ve put on my noise-cancelling headphones with some self-hypnosis audio to keep me company, and slid into the sack. They tied me up and so, for about 2 hours I’ve became a decoration.

These jerks shoved cucumber into my mouth! 😤

It went… Okay, I guess. The first hour was very relaxing, and I felt myself slipping out of consciousness, but occasional touches and lound noises pulled me back in. And after about an hour the bondage started to become uncomfortable. Pressure points. Unability to change position. The feeling of being trapped.

So, we stopped. It wasn’t a disaster, and it definitely wasn’t a complete success either. More like a learning experience. Perhaps next time I’d change a few things around. Use a less restrictive harness maybe.

All in all, it was a productive weekend. Lots of memories made. Lots of photos taken. And lots of ideas swirling around in my head for future projects.

Hope you enjoyed reading this ramble as much as I enjoyed reliving it. ✨

Photos and videos will be added later. It’s crunch time!

2025: The Year of Reclaiming Myself

Welcome, you lucky souls, to the end of another year. And what a year it was.

2024 was the year of birth. The year I took my first breaths, stepped onto the stage, and declared, “Here I am!”. It was messy, it was loud, and it was absolutely perfect.

2025? 2025 was the year I learned to walk on my own two legs.

I’ll spare you the boring details of what kicked the year off. Let’s just say the first few months were… clouded. Reality hit hard, and my little plastic world was tested. All I’ll say is that for a while there, the idea of zipping myself up into a suit felt more like a burden than a pleasure.

One such time was during the New Year holidays in January. A massive meetup in Moscow, organized by our friends in the capital. Everyone was thrilled to gather up. The largest Russian kigu gathering! Imagine that! Hika was buzzing with energy, Alisa was planning a million costumes… Everyone was so happy.

And I was just… there. Trapped in a haze. My personal problems were still weighing on me heavily, and the joy I usually felt in these settings was muffled. It was a strange feeling, being surrounded by so much light and happiness and feeling like you’re under water. I pushed through. I danced, I interacted with others, I talked to the new people. It was fun. But it wasn’t… freeing. Not yet. Still, I’m glad I was able to make it. I really needed it, and everyone was there for me.

February and March were a blur. This was the toughest time, and I barely dressed up two times, once for every month. Mostly to test some new clothes and make sure I didn’t completely lose touch with the craft. It was lonely, sitting at home, looking out at the snow falling, and wondering if my sparkle would ever return. I tested out a few outfits on… But it was just… practice. An empty gesture.

Springing Back Up

The turning point came in April, when I finally received the gift I’d been dreaming of for years.

Princess Lolita. Not just any dress. The dress. A cascade of cream lace, layered petticoats that could have filled a ballroom, and the pièce de résistance—a massive bonnet adorned with roses and beads that practically ate my face. I paired it with a beautiful flower adorned staff. The moment I unboxed it, I swear, my heart stopped beating for a second.

I slipped into it. And the magic returned. It felt just as right, just as perfect, as I’d imagined. For weeks, all I did was prepare. I practiced poses, how to walk in it, learned how to sit without ruining the layers, and dreamed of the photo shoot.

But I couldn’t do it yet. The weather in Saint Petersburg was being cruel, refusing to warm up properly. So instead of getting a proper photo shoot done, I used that energy to reconnect.

April became a month of friendship. My local friends and I started meeting again, sometimes two or three times a week! We’d talk, we’d joke, we’d do small photoshoots. The loneliness receded. I felt like myself again—snarky, sarcastic, and utterly alive. My friends helped pull me out of my slump, reminding me who I was meant to be.

And then, in late May, the moment arrived. Tulip season at a nearby park.

It was perfect. The tulips were in full, vibrant bloom. The air was cool. No direct sunlight was hitting us. The weather cooperated beautifully, allowing us to capture everything without the harsh shadows or sweating mess we usually endure. I wore my new Princess Lolita gown. We spent the entire morning there, capturing images that looked straight out of a fairytale.

Looking back at those photos, they are stunning. I am stunning.

Though, not everything was frills and roses (pun intended). While these pictures don’t show this due a sheer volume of the dress and skill of a photographer… After all the stress, the depression, and the comfort eating from earlier in the year… I had packed on some serious kilos. It wasn’t showing on these photos, but was clear as day on others. On myself. Every time I saw my reflection, I’d wince.

So, I made a choice.

For the summer, the goal was simple: get my body back. No more hiding, no more letting my mind win over my physical form. It was a new challenge, and I was ready. Diet, exercise, discipline. It would be tough, but what’s a doll’s life without a bit of hard work?

Coming Out in Summer

Summer hit, and it brought the energy we all craved. In early June, we gathered again. This time it wasn’t a massive convention, but a smaller, cozier meetup just outside of Saint-Petersburg. Less crowded, more private, and infinitely more… eventful.

We played in our PVC and latex suits, letting the summer heat make everything slick and uncomfortable in the most wonderful way. I walked around the cottage in petplay like a doggie on a leash, just for fun. My knees were hurting like hell, but it was worth it. Of course I’ve brought my princess dress and played a lost doll arrived in a wrong fairy tale. The roleplaying was amazing! And let’s not forget a kebab ArkStranger suddenly decided to cook for us. A delicious, chaotic, greasy masterpiece.

But the biggest development of the summer came when I invested in a steady-cam for my phone. Suddenly, the whole world was an opportunity. Walking through the city became an expedition.

We’d venture out together, recording our adventures. These walks became my new favorite obsession. We’d wander the streets of Saint-Petersburg, not too far yet, only visiting safe and known locations, but still it was a blast! Walking together, doing silly things, waiving at passersby, and recording it all so that we can watch it later with proper eyesight. It’s pure, unadulterated joy.

One particularly memorable day, I insisted on a walk during a heavy rainstorm. We got absolutely soaked. It was exhilarating. The city looked so different—all dark colors, glistening wet streets, and the sound of raindrops was just… everything. The videos we shot that day are some of my absolute favorites. The aesthetic was incredible.

Though, let me tell you a small secret. I had to replace all the audio. Completely.

My phone’s mic, being exposed to the rain, eventually got so wet it sounded like it was placed directly at the bottom of a swimming pool. All I got were weird, garbled, bubbling sounds that made no sense whatsoever. It was hilarious in its own right, but in the end, I just muted the footage and put over some proper pleasant rain sounds. Don’t tell anyone though!

Conquering the streets in Autumn

2025: The Year of Reclaiming Myself (Part 4)

Autumn brought a new kind of excitement. In September, I went to our local anime-con. Not as a participant, not as an observer, but as one of the main attractions. I walked in as Makima.

And holy hell, was the timing right.

It was literally one week after the new Chainsaw Man movie came out, and the world was absolutely obsessed. People recognized me from a block away. It was non-stop photos. Selfies, group photos, pictures with other Denji, Power, Aki and other Makima cosplayers. We were a pack, a family. It was chaotic, loud, and the absolute peak of cosplay fandom energy. For a whole weekend, I wasn’t just me; I was Makima. It was intoxicating.

September also mark the end of my weight losing endeavor. It was hard, not gonna lie. But I’ve managed to reach my goal and lose 12% of body weight. And I’m still holding it!

But the real test came in October.

I decided it was time to cut the apron strings. Time to go it alone. First step was easy. Just walking around my neighborhood, late at night. No crowds, no pressure. It felt liberating. But soon, that wasn’t enough.

One crisp autumn evening, I ventured into the very heart of the tourist trap—the historical center. I felt powerful, untouchable. And then I learned a harsh lesson: not everyone out there has your best interests at heart.

I ran into a pair of “street photographers,” very friendly and professional-sounding at first. They offered to take my pictures for free, and if I liked it, I could buy a photo for a “small donation.” Sounds harmless, right?

Wrong. I posed for a few shots. When they showed them to me, they were terrible. Out of focus, bad angles, clearly rushed. Yes, they gave those to me as promised. But I didn’t liked it a bit, but they became insistent that I pay them a fee for the “service”. And you know, as a kigu doll, I can’t exactly say “No”. Not verbally at least. So it was hard to properly argue my point. Thank God I don’t carry a lot of cash on these trips! I gave them like a 1000 rubles and ran away from them as fast as I could. Never again. Learn the lesson!

And then came my most ambitious solo trip: a trip to the suburbs. Specifically an eco trail. The plan was simple. Walk to a bus stop, take a bus ride to a nice park I’d seen pictures of. The walk to the park was wonderful. Quiet, peaceful. A perfect solo stroll. The nearby autumn beach was geat as well, especially since it was a sunset. The scenery was breathtaking.

The trouble started on the way home. I was tired. I underestimated how busy the bus routes would be. I hopped onto an already packed bus.

The heat, the swaying, the smell… my stomach twisted. And I started to feel… queasy. My mask started to feel heavy. Too tight. I thought I was going to throw up right into the thing. I spent the entire 2 hour ride clenching my jaw, trying to breathe through my nose, and praying I wouldn’t ruin one of my most prized possessions with the contents of my own stomach.

When I finally stumbled out of the bus and got home, the first thing I did was rip that damn thing off and collapse. It was disgusting and horrifying.

But I made it. I faced my fears, I took my risks, and I came out on the other side with stories to tell. The thrill was real, and I was alive. More alive than ever.

November Trip and the End of the Year

November was supposed to be another fun trip, but turned into a rescue mission. The Toguchi-con in Moscow… my god. To clarify some thing: inside our Russian kigu community, we have a group of kigus, who want to promote us at amongst normies. “Better we say what we want about ourselves, than someone else does”. I think they have a good point, but I’ve politely declined proper participation in their activities for personal reasons. Anyway, they’ve decided to make a booth at Toguchi-con, with Hika, Sonya and Mary leading the charge. I’ve decided to attend con as just a guest and visit their booth when I was feeling like it.

But… Everything went awry immediately when we arrived to Moscow.

Among the arrivals to our group was a very special guest: Akane-san. A kigu from Germany, making the trek across the continent at a time when that journey is… complicated, to say the least. And right from the chaos of the airport, they arrived into the chaos we all faced. We spent 3 days to try and find an apartment for them, Hika and Ness to stay at, and every next option was worse than the previous one. Ruined and smelly rooms, horny dudes, arriving at literal brothel… It was a total trainwreck. Luckily for me, Alisa got us two a proper flat, and we just took Akane with us, with Hika and Ness staying at other’s places.

Yet, it was far from over!

Mary, who was their main organizer, got sick, and with logistics changed last minute, I had to step in. Move things around. Entertain our quest. To be fair, I’m not complaining! This was the time my friends needed help, and I was glad to provide it! I’ve helped Akane with their suit, carried stuff, calmed down people. Whatever was needed.

The event itself went fine. Bit more hectic than I like, but still very much enjoyable. I met many of cool and funny cosplayers, took a group photo with lolitas. The list goes on. Still have to white a proper post about this too. Kamisama, please give me time!

Anyways, after the con I did some more meetups and then headed back home to Saint-Petersburg. The end of the year was about recovering and preparing for the new year. A perfect time to introduce a new face!

The first event was our annual trip to the Doll Fair with my two closest friends. It’s always a pleasure. I like going to anime-cons, but this place feels different. More… peaceful. We don’t need to perform. We just… exist. Admire the craftsmanship of others and appreciate each other.

Then came the first snowfall. Oh, I love it. Everything goes quiet and clean. I spent a whole afternoon wandering the parks, taking videos of myself among the bare trees and fresh powder. One video was a personal favorite: I found an old bench and just… sat. Completely still. No talking. No moving. I became a statue. A doll. Lost. Waiting. For 15 minutes, I held that pose. I recorded it just to see what it would feel like to truly become a thing in the world, not a person acting like one.

Finally, to cap it all off, a meetup in December where I unveiled my newest project. My Shimakaze mask is… almost ready.

She wasn’t a planned child actually. I was strong-handed into getting her since I had her cosplay lying around. Again, I’ll write a proper post about her later, since she isn’t finished yet. But now I have 3 masks (actually 4, but I’ll talk about it the next post).

So, there it is. My year.

It started with the grey, suffocating fog of personal issues. A doll, lost and forgotten. I thought my sparkle might be gone for good.

But this year… I fought back. I reconnected. I took risks. I went solo. I faced chaos, scammers, and health issues. I helped friends. I laughed until my sides hurt. I explored my city with a new set of eyes and made memories I will treasure forever.

I’m not perfect. Far from it. My masks give me headaches. I still dance like I’ve got two left feet. I can be a cruel bitch if you push the right buttons. But I am mine.

And 2026? That’s for my next post. I have a few commitments I want to take, like making this website live, and I can’t wait to get started. The doll has something to say.

Happy New Year, you lucky bastards.

Yours, Ellachlor